Wives and husbands (Ephesians 5.22-33)

Having urged the Ephesian believers to ‘yield’ to each other in their shared life together (5.19-21), Paul summarises this with 5.21. ‘Yielding’ to Christ should lie at the heart of the church (5.24). He then notes that the relationship of a woman and a man in marriage is a supreme example of that ‘yielding’ to each other in the context of the Christian church and life with Christ. As Christians, we should not be pushing for what we want, but desiring to yield to the views of our sisters and brothers in Christ.

The Greek word used in 5.21 and 24 (Greek: hupotasso) is commonly translated as ‘submit’, but this can give a wrong picture of its real meaning. ‘Yield’ may convey its true sense better. ‘Hupotasso’ was used in the army for the placing of shields in close rank together. This tight formation gave the Roman army enormous strength both in defence and in attack. The emphasis of ‘hupotasso’ was on the shields being linked alongside each other, although they overlapped and a new shield would be placed slightly below its neighbour. Likewise in the body of the church and in marriage, Paul is underlining our oneness together alongside each other with a strength which will include serving one another and being willing to yield to the will of Christ, to our fellow believers and to our partner in marriage.

The wife

Although this passage is frequently discussed and expounded in relation to the debate on women’s rights, Paul says relatively little about the wife’s responsibilities. Much more is said about the duties of a husband which far out-weigh those of the wife. Indeed, compared to the strict imperative of the command that husbands must love their wives, Paul’s word to wives comes across more gently. NIV contradicts Paul’s attitude when it adds the word ‘must’ in the concluding verse. A better translation would be “the wife should respect her husband” (5.33)! Paul only urges such respect as an ideal.

On the other hand, NIV has softened the original Greek in 5.33 to accord with modern sensitivities. It recommends ‘respect’ (5.33), whereas Paul says wives should ‘fear’ their husband. In the New Testament we are commonly told to ‘fear the Lord’, meaning that we should deeply honour and respect him. It does not imply a sense of abject terror! ‘Fear’ in the Bible has a very positive sense of relationship. It is very much to be hoped that Christian wives may see something of the nature of God himself in their husbands and therefore deeply honour them accordingly.

The Husband

The command to husbands to love their wife is immediately related to its model in Christ loving the church (5.25). The tense of the verb ‘loved’ (Aorist) shows that Paul was thinking particularly of Christ’s once-for-all sacrifice on the cross. Husbands’ love for their wife means a Christ-like sacrificial service and self-giving, not authority and power. The man is called to leave his parents in order to be uniquely united with his wife, to “become one flesh” (5.31). In loving their wife, husbands actually ‘love themselves’ (5.28). It is as if the husband is feeding and caring for himself (5.29). In this mutual life of love and unity, both wife and husband should flourish.

Christ’s purpose in giving himself in atoning sacrifice on the cross results in sanctifying the church, presenting us to the Lord with all our sin washed clean.  We are to be “without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish”, “holy and blameless” (5.27). This cleansing comes with baptism through God’s word (5.26). Baptism as the outward sign of God’s promises, together with the Bible as God’s revealed word, only come into effect as people commit themselves in faith to Christ. The emerging beauty will make the church shine radiantly in our dark world (5.27). Paul writes this concerning Christ and his church (5.32), but he relates it directly to marriage. Living within the assured and self-sacrificing love of her husband, wives can flourish with spiritual and moral beauty, so that they too radiate the glory of the Lord. Let us not lose the awesome splendour of God’s purposes for wives and husbands in true Christian marriage!

Conclusion (5.33)

This concluding verse strongly emphasizes that God’s purposes in marriage apply to each one of us, not just to saintly Christians! This is God’s ideal. Husbands should (not ‘must’!) love their wife as they love themselves. And wives should (also not ‘must’!) ‘fear’ their husband. What is our church, and we ourselves, doing to promote God’s ideals for Christian marriage? With the tragedy of unhappy or limping marriages and the fearful realities of divorce and sexual perversion in today’s world, Christian marriage should indeed shine radiantly and draw people to faith in Christ.

Imitating God – Christ’s love, offering and sacrifice (Ephesians 5.1-21)

God’s tremendous purpose that we should be filled with all the fullness of God (3.19) has already led to two great “therefore” passages (4.1, 17). It now flows naturally into the third “therefore” in 5.1, that we should imitate God and thus become more like him. God is characterised supremely by love, so we should “walk in love” (5.2). The word translated ‘walk’ (Greek: peripateite) means the overall life-style which determines what we do day-by-day. In this God calls Christians to follow Christ who “gave himself up for us as an offering and sacrifice”. Whereas our traditional church creeds omit any mention of Jesus’ years of life and ministry before his crucifixion (“Born of the Virgin Mary” skips immediately to “was crucified”!), the word translated ‘offering’ in 5.2 seems to refer to Jesus’ life on earth, while ‘sacrifice’ clearly refers to his atoning death for us. These words were commonly used in Israel’s sacrificial system for the offerings to the priests and the sacrifice to God with its shed blood. Modelling ourselves on Christ, we are also called to a sacrificial life of love. Like Jesus, we are called to loving service, rejecting the life pattern of Gentile officials who ‘exercise authority’ (Mark 10.42-45).

No fellowship with gross sin (5.3-7)

Paul earnestly desires the Ephesian church to demonstrate a godly purity as “God’s holy people” (5.3). Had the immorality of their surrounding society seeped into the church? Paul reminds his readers of God’s wrath which boils against disobedient Christians, who indulge in the horrendous sins listed in these verses (5.6). We may imagine how Paul would have reacted if he had witnessed many of our modern churches with their easy tolerance of sin and their avoidance of all teaching of God’s holy anger against sin!

Paul’s concluding ‘therefore’ in 5.7 seems at first sight to contradict Jesus’ parable of the wheat and tares (Matthew 13.24-30). Jesus tells us that there will always be tares within the church, but God will deal with them in the final judgment. Jesus is not saying that the church should allow gross sin as acceptable among believers in Christ. Paul’s conclusion to this passage in 5.7 warns us against being “partners with them”. Markus Barth links 5.7 with the command to “have nothing to do with their fruitless deeds of darkness” (5.11). Paul is not rejecting acceptance of them as people, but he opposes all compromise with their evil deeds. We must never encourage them or join them in their sin. Indeed we are called to teach against such sin and expose it in all its darkness. It has no place in our inheritance of God’s kingdom of righteousness (5.5).

Paul’s list of sins could easily have been written for our modern societies. Remembering the great temple of Diana in Ephesus, we are not surprised that sexual immorality and impurity heads the list. This is followed by ‘greed’, discontent with what we have and the constant desire for more. Ephesus was famous for its clever orators’ licentious jokes and stories, but Paul rejects their boasting and condemns such “foolish talk and coarse joking” (5.4). However common in contemporary society, sexual immorality, discontented greed and dirty talk should have no place among Christians.

Light and darkness (5.8-14), wise and unwise (5.15-21)

Reminding his readers that they “were once darkness” (5.8), Paul assumes that faith in Christ should result in radical change. The sins of 5.3-7 should be replaced with “the fruit of the light”. As Christians we need to discover “what pleases the Lord” (5.10). In our love and gratitude for all his grace, we earnestly desire to give him pleasure. Our lives must therefore be filled with “goodness, righteousness and truth” (5.9). ‘Goodness’ assumes God-like character, for God is good – and in the Genesis creation account he pronounced his original creation ‘good’ and humanity as ‘very good’. ‘Righteousness’ assumes both God-like moral holiness and social justice in all our relationships. ‘Truth’ also characterises the nature of God, and Jesus is the truth (cf. John 14.6). So, imitation of God must include being honest and trustworthy. We badly need these characteristics of God in our world today!

Debate surrounds the origin of the quotation in 5.14. Probably it comes from a Christian hymn. Let us not just wander aimlessly through life in a sleep-walk, but “wake up” and be alert with the light of Christ shining on us! “Redeem the time” (5.16; NIV “making the most of every opportunity”), understanding “what the Lord’s will is”. This is true wisdom and requires the constant work of the Holy Spirit in us. The exhortation to be “filled with the Spirit” is in the continuous present tense. It does not indicate a particular one-off experience of being filled with the Spirit, but an on-going life with the Spirit inspiring our every thought, word and deed.

Being filled with the Spirit particularly affects our fellowship together with other Christians in God’s church. Paul therefore moves immediately from the exhortation to be filled with the Spirit to encourage Christians to rejoice together in praising the Lord “with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs” (5.19). Such praise should go together with positive gratitude to God for all his loving-kindness and grace.

In conclusion, we should notice the repeated “one another” (5.19, 21). In a biblically-based Christ-centred church we should all have a ministry to each other. We form a body together with every member yielding as servants to each other (5.21). Does your church function as the body of Christ, reflecting this every-member pattern?

“Filled unto all the fullness of God” – therefore . . .“ (Ephesians 4.17-32)

The total life-changing brilliance of these words defies us: “Filled unto all the fullness of God” (3.19). How far short we fall! But what a goal for life! Let these words inspire us as we pray for ourselves and others! In Ephesians they move Paul to break out with an inspiring doxology (3.20/21), followed by three passages beginning with the word “therefore” (Greek: oun: NIV “then” in 4.1, “so” in 4.17 and “therefore” in 5.1). The fruit of being filled with all God’s fullness must affect everything in our lives. We have already looked at the first “therefore” in 4.1-16 with Paul urging the church as the body of Christ to live and build themselves up in love together. Now we move on to the second “therefore”, in which Paul develops how we should ‘live lives worthy of our calling’ (4.1).

Don’t follow the Gentiles’ life-style! (4.17-19)

The Christians in Ephesus lived under the shadow of Diana’s imposing temple and were surrounded by all the gross immorality which relationship with her inspired. Sexual sin and dishonesty had become acceptable and even praiseworthy in their society. How easy it is for Christians too just to accept the values and practices around us without challenging them in the light of God’s revealed word in the Bible!

In one long sentence (4.17/18) Paul castigates the Gentiles’ thinking as uselessly empty and false, being darkened and ignorant with hardened hearts. They had become callous, indulging in intemperate licentiousness leading into extreme uncleanness (4.19). The Jews prided themselves in their higher moral standards, but the pressures of common thinking and behaviour can easily undermine Christian faith and life-style.

Knowing Christ – truth and righteousness (4.20-24)

What does it mean when we come into relationship with Christ, when we come to ‘know Christ’ (4.20)? It is markedly different from association with the goddess Diana (cf. 4.17-19)! But you “did not come to know Christ like that” (4.20). Coming to faith in Christ meant that the Ephesians (and we too!) had “put on the new self” and were “created to be like God in righteousness and holiness of the truth” (4.24). We may note the Aorist tense of these verbs. On our conversion to Christ we have already been given new life, in which we have been recreated to live in holiness.  Having already received these immense gifts, this immediate change in us engenders an on-going process (Present continuous tense) of being “renewed in the spirit of our mind” (4.23). Our thinking determines our life-style.

In these verses Paul stresses the vital importance of truth, repeating the word ‘truth’ several times (cf.4.15, 17, 24, 25).  Our knowledge of Christ comes from what we hear and are taught (4.21). May our teaching be “the truth that is in Jesus” (4.21), the good news of Jesus’ life and death for our salvation! This truth has been revealed to us in God’s word, the Bible. The Gospel of Jesus not only contains truth, but it actually is ‘the truth’, unique and perfect.

As our lives are now based on God’s truth, we are called to be “like God in the righteousness and holiness of the truth” (4.24). Very down-to-earth consequences must ensue in each of us. As Christians we should speak truth to each other as neighbours, fellow-members of the one body of Christ (4.25). Of course we are to speak truth also to everyone, but Paul is concerned particularly with Christians’ loving relationships of truth within the church’s fellowship.

Christians together (4.25-32)

Down with falsehood! Up with truth in the fellowship of God’s church! Be careful not to fall into sin when angry! Let not anger remain in our hearts day after day! The devil is eager to get a foothold in the church, and untruth or on-going anger gives Satan entry. What a challenging list of exhortations! How easily we allow the Devil to spoil our loving fellowship in the church by failure to forgive, allowing anger and bitterness to prevail! “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us!” (4.25-28). “Be kind and compassionate with each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (4.32).

How many Christian leaders have fallen from grace through financial dishonesty! So, no stealing (4.28)! Rather, Paul urges his readers to be engaged in useful employment, so that they can “share with those in need” 4.28). A rise in salary not only allows a higher standard of living, but it permits even more generous giving to the mission of the church.

Having received the truth of the Gospel and warned against tolerating sin lest  Satan gain a foothold in God’s church, Paul now warns against the danger of ‘grieving the Holy Spirit of God’ (4.30). He is the HOLY Spirit, united with the Father in hating sin of every kind. The Holy Spirit is deeply saddened by anything less than holy in our individual lives and in our fellowship together as God’s people. In our assurance of salvation we depend on the Holy Spirit as the guarantee/seal of our eternal redemption. So, let us be very careful not to grieve him! God redeemed us from slavery to sin when Jesus died in our place and paid the price for our release from spiritual death. We therefore now belong to God as his possession to serve him with all we have and are.

One Body and the fullness of Christ (Ephesians 4.1-16)

Although it is commonly thought that the benediction in 3.20/21 marks a definite break between the first three chapters and the start of something new in chapter 4, the use of “therefore” in 4.1 shows that the consequences of Paul’s previous thought continues in his mind. Because Paul desires that the Ephesian believers will be filled with the fullness of God in the love of Christ (3.19, 4.13), he urges them to live lives worthy of their calling (4.1).

To achieve this, they will need great humility, gentleness and patience as they “bear with one another in love” (4.2). They need constantly to remember that, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, they are bonded (same word as ‘prisoner’ in 4.1, but with the prefix meaning ’with’) to each other in peace (4.3).

Quoting Psalm 68.18, Paul changes it. Instead of saying that people gave gifts to God, Paul says God “gave gifts to people” (4.8). Jesus has come down to earth and ascended back to the heavenlies in order to “fill the whole universe” with his divine presence. Christ has given his grace, his generous and undeserved kindness, “to each one of us” (4.7). We can only marvel and praise God for his amazing love and generosity to all who believe in Christ.

Our unity in the Spirit

Paul’s letters constantly return to the vital theme of Christian fellowship and unity. Together as Christians we form one body with the one indwelling Spirit. We share the same assured hope of eternal life. We all live under the one Lord, having the same saving faith which has the outward sign of baptism. Debate hovers round the meaning here of ‘one faith’. Does it mean that we share the same fundamental biblical beliefs? Or does it refer to us all having put our faith in Jesus? I believe that it bears both ideas together. And what about ‘baptism’? Baptism always goes hand in hand with faith. Without faith baptism becomes an empty ritual of little significance. But to those who have faith in Jesus Christ as their Saviour and Lord it is the outward sign of God’s promises.

Such loving oneness together requires real ‘effort’ (4.3). For this we need gifted men and women with particular ministries. This is not for their own status or fulfilment, but “to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up” (4.12). Some are called to be apostles and they head the list. Traditionally, church leaders who had personally seen the incarnate Christ were called ‘apostles’. But this title also conveys the sense of those who are sent as missionaries by God to plant new churches – ‘apostle’ literally means someone who has been sent. For the life and growth of the church, the preaching and teaching of God’s Word is essential. That was the task of ‘prophets’, particularly in those early days before the New Testament scriptures were available. Still today the church also needs evangelists, pastors (the word means ‘shepherds’) and gifted teachers. Let us make sure our church makes good use of such gifted people within its body!

The aim of our unity

Our sights should be set on whole-hearted commitment. In his writings Hans Kung castigates any contentment with compromised discipleship of Christ, dismissing it as ‘wishy-washy theology’. The word ‘reach’ (4.13) is used nine times in Acts to designate final arrival at one’s destination. The process of building up the church assumes the definite aim that we may all “become mature”. The word here translated as ‘mature’ relates to our final goal (Greek ‘teleion’ from ‘Telos’) in God’s gift of eternal life. Our aim is the attainment of “the whole measure of the fullness of Christ” (cf. 3.19; 4.10). All of us as Christians are called to live lives of truth and love (4.15), so that we may be built up into an adult relationship of union with Christ (4.15).

This can only come about if all the members of the body of Christ truly love one another and each one plays their part in the ministry of the church. Our bodies suffer when the eyes fail to see or the legs don’t function well or arthritis hits our joints! So, the task of the apostles, prophets, evangelists, shepherds and teachers is always “to prepare God’s people for works of diaconal service” (4.12). This ministry may be constantly undermined by false or inadequate teaching by “the cunning and craftiness” of people with “deceitful scheming” (4.14). The word ‘cunning’ links such wrong teaching to the ‘cunning’ of the Devil in the fall of Eve (cf. 2 Corinthians 11.3). Let us beware such Satan-inspired wrong teaching, and let us hunger for edifying biblical teaching in love! So, Foulkes observes that the duty of the shepherd is “to feed the flock with spiritual food and to see that they are protected from spiritual danger”. Paul would surely add a further task of the shepherd. The sheep need to be closely bound into a deeply loving fellowship with Christ and with each other, in which each one is encouraged and trained to exercise their gifts.